Remember When…

On several occasions I’ve written about the ways in which we begin to come into being as unique persons from within an interpersonal mommy-daddy-baby matrix.  The impact of these early interactions are so vital and long-lasting, they inform our behavior and beliefs about relationships for the remainder of our lives.

Greedy for Love

This column originally appeared in the Orange County Register. Greed is not a word used frequently any more.  Tending to be associated with quaintly prim eras and Victorian novels, the sooty world of Charles Dickens comes to mind with its pickpockets and severe judgments.

Isn’t it just a scandal…?

This column originally appeared in the Orange County Register. One more time… Once again, thin veneers of public pose have cracked exposing very private lives.  So common as to be utterly prosaic, another powerful politician has been caught in an extramarital tryst with a political groupie, a less dominant woman aroused by power.

Aging: the coda to life’s mythic themes

This column originally appeared in the Orange County Register. “He’s gotten completely paranoid and is speaking in vernacular I don’t recognize,” my friend explained slowly and evenly, though clearly in an anxious state.  “The psychiatrist put him on medication, and I don’t know why.  I think he’s having a bad reaction.”

A Father’s Tale

This column originally appeared in the Orange County Register. Because I often emphasize the importance of mothers, mothering and the maternal, it may appear that I completely disregard the masculine and paternal.  I’ll clarify that by distinguishing between an actual mother and a maternal function.  Parental functions may be construed as active or passive, directive […]

Sadness and Mourning

This column originally appeared in the Orange County Register A screenwriter friend gave me an article discussing the salutary aspects of sadness and the ways in which our contemporary culture tends to quickly erase it or prematurely foreclose upon its gritty psychological usefulness in a quest for perennial cheery happiness.  As if happiness were a […]

Inside Out

This column originally appeared in the Orange County Register. We are too often saturated with regrettable accounts of public figures exposed in salacious but banal trysts.  Illicit sex sells.  What a thumping bore.

Tumbling the locks

The other day I received a disquieting video email.  A clip from a local broadcast news segment illuminated, for any petty crook who might not have already known, the proper use of an interesting adaptable key that fits easily into almost any lock.

The Importance of Mutuality in Relationships

A relationship, by design, is a two-person field.  Actually more if you consider all the people inhabiting your mind.  With mom, dad and your third grade teacher with the quivering upper arms, it’s a pretty crowded place.  You are the unique product of all your relationships.  This internal constellation of characters forming your identity is […]

Perchance to Dream: Part II

The uncanny content of dreams often makes them appear to be communications from afar.  However seductive it is to imagine mysterious and distant origins, the equally fascinating explanation is that dream images are your own mental products.